Listing descriptions have their own vocabulary. Agents write them to make a home sound appealing in a few lines, and the same phrases come up again and again. None of them are lies, but they can hide a lot. Here is how we read the classics, and what we check when we see them.
"Cozy" and "charming"
Usually this means small. That can be perfectly fine, but compare the square footage with other homes nearby and look closely at the floor plan. Ask whether the stated size includes a garage conversion, a basement or an enclosed porch, and whether those spaces were permitted.
"Full of character" or "original details"
This often describes an older home that has not been updated. The moldings and fireplaces may be lovely, but so may be the 1950s wiring. With an older house, ask about the age of the roof, the electrical panel, the plumbing and, in California, the foundation and any seismic retrofit. In Florida, ask about the roof and the windows, because they affect your insurance as much as your comfort.
"Bring your vision" or "great bones"
The home needs work, sometimes a lot of it. Price this as a renovation project, not a house with some cosmetic flaws. Before you offer, it is worth paying a contractor to walk through it with you and give rough costs. Ask the city for the permit history too, so you know what has been done legally and what has not.
"Sun-drenched" and "bright"
Often true, but the photos may have been taken at the best hour on the best day. Visit at different times. A west-facing room can be glorious at 5pm and unbearable in August without good shades or cooling. North-facing rooms in San Francisco can be quiet and cool, which some buyers love and others do not.
"Walk to everything"
Great for daily life, but it can mean traffic noise, nightlife or limited parking. Walk the street on a Friday night and a weekday morning. Check whether street parking needs a residential permit and how long the waiting list is.
"Motivated seller" and "priced to sell"
The seller may have bought elsewhere, may be relocating, or the home may have been on the market longer than expected. It does not always mean the price is low. Look at the listing history: price reductions, how many days it has been listed, and whether it was taken off the market and relisted.
"Low HOA" or "amenity-rich building"
For condos, read the association budget, the reserve study and the minutes from recent board meetings. A low monthly fee can mean the reserves are thin and a special assessment is coming. In Florida, ask whether the building has completed the structural inspections that newer state law requires for many condominiums.
"As is"
The seller will not make repairs. In both California and Florida, sellers still have to disclose known problems, and you can still inspect. Make sure your offer gives you time to do that, and that you understand what you are agreeing to if you waive any contingencies.
What the description does not say
Sometimes the most important information is missing. If a description talks at length about finishes but says nothing about the kitchen, the yard or the view, ask why. If there are no photos of a bathroom, there may be a reason. A good agent will answer these questions directly, and if they will not, you have learned something useful anyway.
When you find a listing you like, send it to us. We will read between the lines with you, pull the permit history and recent sales, and tell you honestly what we think it is worth before you spend a Saturday viewing it.
